Today was good day!
I feel a little guilty saying this knowing that my kids weren’t home at all. Their father took them camping for two days and I decided to use that time to do all the things I haven’t been able to do when the kids are home.
So… the first day, I DID NOTHING!!!! It was amazing! I hadn’t done that in so long! Just sat around in my PJs reading, watching TV, catching up on facebook….Okay, okay…so I did do some practical stuff, like banking, laundry and cleaning, but I did it very relaxed!!!!
Today started with surprise. A friend of mine took a course this year called "Oh Mama", at
Its focus was on Art and Motherhood. It was a fascinating course and she decided
to write her paper at the end of the year about me and my art. During the year,
we had sat together often and discussed art and motherhood. She interviewed me
about my art, and this morning I read the paper she wrote. It moved me to
tears! First of all, it was interesting
to read about myself! Plus some of the
things she wrote about my art were enlightening. She saw things that I never
thought of, or intended, in my paintings. I always use to wonder what some of
the artists in museums and books would think about the interpretations we have
made of their art work. Reading this paper today gave me a feeling of what it is
like to have someone else write about you and your intentions from their
perspective. I hope her professor is as moved as I was!!! Hebrew University
I then spent the rest of the day PAINTING!!!! What a pleasure! I really haven’t done that in too long. During the month of August the kids were home everyday, all day, leaving no time to paint. Then the school year started and I thought I would be able to get back into my painting. But then I was too preoccupied with planning all my classes and teaching (and learning to write a blog!) to find that big chunk of time to really dive in. Today I did, and boy does it feel great! If you are an artist you know that feeling: that amazing feeling of getting lost in your artwork. It is the best feeling on earth. It is a spiritual, emotional and physical awakening. I feel energized, like I haven’t in awhile. I have noticed that about myself over the years: that when I don’t create I get down and when I am creating I am a different person.
So, how do we find that balance between motherhood, life, work, and creating our art so we stay personally balanced?
I think the problem is sometimes we want all or nothing. If we can’t find that perfect time, complete quiet, no kids…or whatever other obstacles we lay out for ourselves, we cannot create. I know I am like that. I need my space and time to paint. So for now, I am looking for that balance within my life, cause I am a mother, partner and teacher and all those things will get their full attention; but I need to –no, I HAVE to - paint. I have to for my own sanity, in order to be a good mother, partner and teacher. Therefore, I am putting aside one day a week from now on. I have one morning that I don’t teach and I am NOT going to go shopping or meet friends or even read a book! I will paint! The dishes will still get done, the laundry sorted and food will be on the table … and I will be HAPPY to do it!!!!
So, don’t make excuses to not create! Make time for yourself. Put time aside every week to create. The time will never be perfect so don’t try to make it so or wait for it to be, just DO IT!!!!!
Is anyone else struggling to find that balance? Write a comment here and share your experience. Maybe we can all learn from each other and encourage one another….
Having viewed your work,it would be interesting to see what was written in the paper and how others interpret what you created.ReplyDelete
לדעתי את גם אמא נפלאה,גם אמנית מדהימה וגם חברה טובה!!! המשיכי כך ובהצלחה
OK I have a confession... I was already a bit emotional when I opened this post, but I am crying again now. Yes, I am also struggling to find balance. I am so out of balance that I still feel SO FAR from being able to make time to create. But you're right Deena, it works backwards. If only I would make time to create then I am much happier and everything's much easier and I would get so much more done and be a better mother, home-maker, a better professional, better friend etc. etc. Thank you for this post. Please keep them - and your incredible artwork - coming! TobyReplyDelete
Thanks I needed that blog. You are the best.ReplyDelete
continuing our conversation. So happy and proud that you have made a decision to do what is GOOD for Deena. We have tendencies to always do, do do for everyone and not take time for ourselves....you deserve the time, need the time snd should take it. You have come into your own...a terrific mother, wonderful, talented, giving teacher and a very special human being. I personally am beginning to learn from you (as I still have not learned on my own to take time for SELMA) YOGA and now this. Keep up the good work, inspiring and helping others and most of all yourself. Love you momReplyDelete
wow!! you keep getting better and better at this writting- this is great stuff!! I too as a mother of four find it so hard to find that balance. I'm not an artist but I create in other ways and it makes me feel good to create. I wish I could just stop being so busy all the time and make the time to just be. I hope you manage to get that once a week in - it's very inspiring and we should all do it!!ReplyDelete
your busy - never sits down - always late - friend....
Sometimes you have to face what you love. You have to sit down and write, paint, or dare that business plan. Don't live with the shame of avoidance one more day. Give you dream 5 minutes. It will give you the world.ReplyDelete
By Tama J. Kieves